It’s taken a minute, well years but I’ve figured it out. I am attracted to energy vampires. You’re thinking is this some True Blood or Twilight crap. No.
An energy vampire is someone who is narcissistic. It’s always about them. You may try to stop them in their tracks but most often people try to disengage. While this may seem the easier route, disengaging is still draining. An energy vampire will suck up all your energy.
An example of an energy vampire, someone who can call you and talk for 30 minutes non-stop. You can say nothing, whether it be intentional or not, and they will not notice. It’s all about them.
They’ll rarely ask you about yourself, if so it’s because they’re waiting for you to throw the question back at them so that they continue.
I only learned this word a few years ago and could identify people who were energy vampires. Just recently, did I realize that a couple of guys that I’ve been in long relationships with exhibited these qualities. What’s hilarious is that in most situations, I avoid energy vampires like the plague. I usually like to go for the jugular with this types in hopes of shutting them or them wanting to avoid me altogether.
I recently told an ex-boyfriend that he was narcissistic. I didn’t throw out the energy vampire term. I cited examples and tried to encourage him to work on this going forward. Naturally, he felt attacked. Basically that was our last conversation and to be quite honest, I’m glad. It was draining being his friend. When I hung up the phone, I knew that while my name was poo in his mind, I was finally free of him. For good.
Luckily, the “new guy” is anything but. Thank goodness for living and learning!